note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize