your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
