go do what you do best...puke behind churches
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
