we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Will exercising make me less horny?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
