Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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