we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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