I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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