I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
