I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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