Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Sorry about my life...
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
