I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
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You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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