New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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