Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
PS: I just woke up from my shower
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize