She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
we're making bets on your personal life
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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