And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
time to smoke my breakfast
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
