I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I am puke
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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