Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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