so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
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Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
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we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize