We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
