i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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