I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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