Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize