I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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