I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
