I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Success! We fucked roommates!
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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