i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
