I wanna passion pit in your ass
this beer tastes like vomit already
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
