She said her name was "party"
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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