yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
home. puking in laundry basket.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize