i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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