Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
