**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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