How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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