I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize