we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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