I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
