This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Randomize