I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
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