how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
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