Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
We got so high we made milksteak
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
