Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
only you would photoshop your dick
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
