Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
