kristin has been a bad kristin
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
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