You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices