This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
