I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
