Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
