dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
