i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize