is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
