Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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